How To Avoid Feeling Like An Inadequate Christian

How To Avoid Feeling Like An Inadequate Christian

  

Reading Time: 5 min 15 sec

The last couple of weeks I hit a major writing block. I would stare at a blank computer screen, for what felt like decades, with just fragments of thoughts. I knew the topic I wanted to explore but every time I went to set pen to paper (or fingers to keys as the case may be) my mind would go completely blank.

 

It was disorienting. I had deadlines to meet, to-dos to cross off and here I was with zip, nada, nothing. As time went on, panic set in, and fear crept up the back of my throat.  Doubts started to plague me.  “Who do you think you are?” it yelled, “You aren’t qualified to write about this topic”.

 

As deadlines came and passed, a cloud of discouragement and fear came with it, whispering in my ear, “You obviously don’t know anything. Sit down and let the professionals handle it.”   

 

Have you experienced the paralyzing fear of inadequacy? Have you worried that if your friends, family, and coworkers really knew you, you would be seen as a failure, a big disappointment, and a fraud?

 

So, what do we do when fear of failure rears its ugly head?  

 

  1. The Imposter

2. Who Am I? 

3. Daily Surrender

 

 

1. The Imposter

 

The Imposter mentality is all around us, we see people filling their lives in a flurry of activity, maintaining superficial relationships, shouting their achievements, all desperately trying to keep the overwhelming sense of emptiness and failure at bay.

 

This crippling fear that we are not enough can paralyze us. We can end up leading lives of stress, pushing ourselves to higher and higher levels of achievement all in the desperate search to find validation. To get some relief from the doubts and fears that harass our thoughts.

 

We can also see this mentality popping up in our relationship with God. We work so hard to do, say, and be all the right things, only to worry that we might be a modern-day Pharisee.

 

Do you ever feel exposed before God?  Do you wonder if he is sitting in heaven passing judgment over our many failures?   If we are honest, we can quickly fall into the trap of feeling like our relationship with God is like a soul-sucking list of “should’s”. 

 

  • I should know the correct way to pray.
  • I should know how to hear from God.
  • I should know more about God.
  • My prayers should sound more spiritual.

 

The list goes on and on.  And so we begin to run on the wheel of performance, trying to prove our worth to God, to others, and trying to fill that hole in our hearts; with a book list, a workshop, a podcast, or a conference. 

 

This exhausting cycle can keep us from embracing all that God has for us. It can keep us from living a life of freedom.

 

 

2. Who Am I? 

 

So, what do we do when we feel the need to find our validation in anything other than God?

 

We need to know who we are.

 

1 John 3:1 says, “What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we’re called children of God! That’s who we really are. But that’s also why the world doesn’t recognize us or take us seriously, because it has no idea who he is or what he’s up to.”

 

We are called children of God.  God chose us. He knows all of our sin, all of our mistakes, all of our frailties, and yet even then he extended his love to us.  The God of the Universe calls us by name, and showers love upon us.  He knows our innermost thoughts, and yet he still chooses to shower lavish love upon us.

 

Romans 8:32-35 unpacks it with these words, “If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us?  

And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen? Who would dare even to point a finger? The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way!”

 

There is nothing and no one that can separate us from the love of God.  We don’t have to work for, manipulate, or portray something that we are not in order to gain his acceptance or approval.  

 

He loves us just as we are, no performance necessary.

 

3. Daily Surrender

So how do we live out of our true identity as beloved children of God?  It needs to become a part of our core DNA.  

1. The Imposter

 

The Imposter mentality is all around us, we see people filling their lives in a flurry of activity, maintaining superficial relationships, shouting their achievements, all desperately trying to keep the overwhelming sense of emptiness and failure at bay.

 

This crippling fear that we are not enough can paralyze us. We can end up leading lives of stress, pushing ourselves to higher and higher levels of achievement all in the desperate search to find validation. To get some relief from the doubts and fears that harass our thoughts.

 

We can also see this mentality popping up in our relationship with God. We work so hard to do, say, and be all the right things, only to worry that we might be a modern-day Pharisee.

 

Do you ever feel exposed before God?  Do you wonder if he is sitting in heaven passing judgment over our many failures?   If we are honest, we can quickly fall into the trap of feeling like our relationship with God is like a soul-sucking list of “should’s”. 

 

  • I should know the correct way to pray.
  • I should know how to hear from God.
  • I should know more about God.
  • My prayers should sound more spiritual.

 

The list goes on and on.  And so we begin to run on the wheel of performance, trying to prove our worth to God, to others, and trying to fill that hole in our hearts; with a book list, a workshop, a podcast, or a conference. 

 

This exhausting cycle can keep us from embracing all that God has for us. It can keep us from living a life of freedom.

 

 

2. Who Am I? 

 

So, what do we do when we feel the need to find our validation in anything other than God?

 

We need to know who we are.

 

1 John 3:1 says, “What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we’re called children of God! That’s who we really are. But that’s also why the world doesn’t recognize us or take us seriously, because it has no idea who he is or what he’s up to.”

 

We are called children of God.  God chose us. He knows all of our sin, all of our mistakes, all of our frailties, and yet even then he extended his love to us.  The God of the Universe calls us by name, and showers love upon us.  He knows our innermost thoughts, and yet he still chooses to shower lavish love upon us.

 

Romans 8:32-35 unpacks it with these words, “If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us?  

And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen? Who would dare even to point a finger? The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way!”

 

There is nothing and no one that can separate us from the love of God.  We don’t have to work for, manipulate, or portray something that we are not in order to gain his acceptance or approval.  

 

He loves us just as we are, no performance necessary.

 

3. Daily Surrender

So how do we live out of our true identity as beloved children of God?  It needs to become a part of our core DNA.  

“In order for our knowing of God’s love to be truly transformational, it must become the basis of our identity…An identity grounded in God would mean that when we think of who we are, the first thing that would come to mind is our status as someone who is deeply loved by God.”-David Benner

 

Instead of identifying ourselves in what we do, we need to see ourselves for who we are in Jesus. This also means that we have to daily (sometimes hourly) surrender ourselves to God.

 

Every morning I ask God to help me place my value, not in my roles (wife, mother, etc.), or in what I accomplish (or don’t) throughout the day, but as his beloved child. I pray that I would come to experience at deeper and deeper levels that there is nothing I need to do to gain his love or approval.  

 

This takes transparency and humility. We want to always be doing for God.  It can be scary, messy and countercultural to accept and rest in his extravagant love. And I sometimes fail miserably.  I get moving too fast and fall back into the lie that my worth, my very identity is tied up in what I produce.

 

“Genuine transformation requires vulnerability. It is not the fact of being loved unconditionally that is life-changing. IT is the risky experience of allowing myself to be loved unconditionally.”-David Benner

 

In our independent culture, receiving an extravagant gift when we didn’t earn it can be uncomfortable. God has done so much for us, we just want to do our part to pay him back. 

When you learn what it means to just be with God instead of working for God, to experience (not just know about) his lavish love… it’s transformational.

 

When fear and self-doubt threaten to take over, remember God chose you. You are the beloved of the king of all kings.  You don’t need to perform to earn his love.  When you daily surrender your feelings of inadequacy to God, and you walk through life resting in the security that you are enough, just as you are, fear loses its grip. You have nothing to prove.

 

Today is the day.  Lay down fear, the rat race of performance and embrace God’s overwhelming, never stopping, beyond comprehension love.. for you. I promise you your life will never be the same.  

 

 

Do you want to learn how to live out of your true identity as one chosen by God? Check out David Benner’s Surrender to Love. This book was transformational in my own journey to laying down fear and living freely and lightly as a beloved child of God.


 What about you? What is your #1 issue when it comes to living life with God?   Leave a comment, and don’t forget to follow Most Important Work on Pinterest!    

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A Homeschool Day In the Life

A Homeschool Day In the Life

  

Reading Time: 4 min 48 sec

When we first decided to homeschool, we had a vision to create a certain type of atmosphere for our children.  We wanted to foster deep family relationships, build life long memories, dive down rabbit holes, and allow our children to bask in the magic of childhood. We wanted our children to have the freedom to play, to explore and to create. We wanted to foster independent thinkers, lifelong learners, and courageous children.

 

And above all else, we wanted to encourage a deep, lifelong relationship with Jesus. We wanted to raise men and women of faith who live out of their identity as beloved children of God.

 

Every time we listen to Anne of Green Gables, giggle over board games, get down on our knees to pray, dance to the blues, and pour over logic, we are making small choices that move us toward our big vision.  

 

When you look at our typical homeschool day,you need to understand that this is what works for our family in this season. I know it can be easy to get caught up in what you are or are NOT doing, we all want to do it RIGHT, but that misses the point of this article. You need to do what’s right for you, what fits your personality, and the needs of your family. 

 

Mama’s, we are in this together! We are stepping out on faith, working hard, and imaging a different type of future for our children.  So, don’t get too caught up in the details (we do not all have to use the same schedule) and let’s give ourselves A LOT of grace, and make choices today that move us toward our vision for the future. 

 

Daily and Weekly Rhythm: 

We found that it helps our day flow smoothly when we follow a rhythm instead of a schedule.

Years ago, I created a schedule, and it totally stressed me out. I always felt like the clock was the master of our day, and we are always struggling to keep up. 

Now, we take our time, and after completing a task, we just move to the next thing on the list.

Every day we work on core subjects but each day has a different emphasis. 

 

Borrowing from Brave Writer our weekly schedule looks something like this: 

Monday– Poetry Tea Time and Free Write 

Tuesday– Nature Study

Wednesday– Art and Music

Thursday– Extra Curricular Activities, Games, and Languages

Friday– Field Trips

 

Morning 

I stumble out of bed and head downstairs to make coffee in the wee hours of the morning after my alarm goes off for the second time.   I realized quickly that I am more productive in the morning than waiting to work until the afternoon. I have found that these early mornings of silence set my day up for success and I actually miss it when I sleep in.  

 

I check my e-mail, work on my blog, and other projects until about 7am.  My children stumble down the stairs ready for snuggles. After helping my husband get out the door for work, we finish up breakfast and start working on our chores for the day.

 

We then move to some type of exercise, in the warmer months we go for a walk, run or bike ride, in the bitter cold of winter, we will use an exercise video to burn off that excess energy.  On certain days of the week, the kids are involved in extracurricular sports.

 

While they finish up chores and play quietly, I go to my room (the quietest place in the house) for devotions. 

 

We officially start the day by lighting our candle to remind us that God is in us and with us. We then spend some time in prayer inviting him into our day.  We move to read our Bible (we ABSOLUTELY LOVE this one) and memorize scripture. Depending on the day, we will either sing some worship songs or work on interactive projects, to help the kids move from head knowledge to heart experience of God.

 

We then snuggle under a huge blanket and start reading through a huge stack of picture books from the library. Books are the foundation for our daily curriculum. We choose books based off of our monthly unit study, the kids’ interest, core subjects, and just for fun books.

 

We then move to work on math, reading lessons, logic, and handwriting. We discovered a great French handwriting book this year that has dramatically improved their handwriting skills. 

 

We intermix lessons with reading aloud to give them a break.  A large amount of our learning can be done together but I do work with my six-year-old on reading separately, while I have my eight-year-old work their handwriting. 

 

Here are our daily goals that we try to make happen FIRST each day. If nothing else gets done, at least I know that these things were accomplished.

Time with Jesus

Outside Time

Read Aloud (Books, Books, and more Books)

Games & Music

 

We will finish out the morning with either free play, listening to an audiobook, art, games and stem activities. 

 

 Afternoon

At around noon, I start making lunch while the kids play. After eating, we begin afternoon quiet time. Where the kids either nap, read books or play quietly in their rooms. I have found that this is a necessary part of our day, as tempers can flare without some time to themselves.  I spend this time working on the blog and completing work projects.

 

At about three-thirty, everyone comes back together to play outside, go for a walk, or depending on the weather, to watch their favorite tv show.

 

Before I know it, it’s time to start preparing dinner and cleaning up the endless art projects, massive forts, and the sticky messes of the day. 

 

Evening 

After dinner, we spend the rest of the night playing a variety of board games together as a family.  We are HUGE fans of board games. We include them wherever we can all throughout our day. They not only are FUN, create lifelong family memories, but they allow us to improve core skills (math, logic etc).

 

After putting kids down to bed.  I finish preparing for the next morning, working on some projects, and reading. Before I know it, its time I am in bed. And yes, I am asleep in about two minutes (morning comes FAST). 🙂

 

That’s our day! What about you? What does your homeschool day look like? Leave a comment, and don’t forget to follow Most Important Work on Pinterest

You Got this Mom!

 

 

12 Kid Approved Gifts that Focus on the True Meaning of Easter

12 Kid Approved Gifts that Focus on the True Meaning of Easter

  

Reading Time: 4 min 56 sec

One of my most favorite memories growing up is visiting my grandparents’ house and participating in a massive scavenger hunt to find my very own Easter basket. Even though the basket was pretty much always hidden in the dryer, it was an amazing time of fun, excitement, and it ended with a basketful of chocolate!  

 

As a follower of Jesus’ the celebration of Easter is the most important day of the year. Jesus death and resurrection are foundational to our faith.   If Easter is so important, what are we communicating to our children when we condense it down to fancy outfits, beautiful eggs, and tons of candy?

 

I am not saying banish your Easter traditions. Instead, what I am saying is that what if we intentionally moved the focus from candy to Jesus? Can you imagine our children experiencing Jesus’ over the top love for them as they come to appreciate his sacrifice on the cross in a whole new way?  

 

Children go deeper in their faith, and own their faith through experiential learning. By watching you, experiencing life in a family and church context, they are being told each day what is really important.  Easter is a huge opportunity to pour into the spiritual lives of our children. So how do we do that?

 

Intentionally invite Jesus into what you are already doing. Instead of giving an Easter basket or gift, full to the brim with chocolate, what if you included some items that would turn your child’s eyes towards Jesus?  Instead of hurrying past Lent without much of a thought, what if you took some time to journey through an Easter devotional or watched a video of Jesus’ death and resurrection together as a family?  These small steps make a POWERFUL impact on the lives of your children.

 

Today, we are going to be talking about twelve amazing resources that you can use to help turn your family’s eyes towards the true meaning of Easter this year!

 

1. Devotionals 

2. Toys 

3. Books 

4. Journals

5. Art 

6. DVD’s

 

 

Good Dirt by Lacy Finn Borgo

1. Good Dirt: Lent, Holy Week & Eastertide

This is the BEST devotional I have found yet for kids during Easter. The devotional is very doable for each day (it’s about a half a page). The devotional covers Lent, Holy Week and Eastertide and is written from an evangelical perspective.

I really appreciate how each devotional is broken into four sections:

– Till (Prayer)

– Plant (Meditate on Scripture)

– Water (Reflect)

– Weed (Examine)

As you travel through lent, this is a great resource to serve as the foundational piece of your day.

Jesus Doll

2. Jesus Doll

My children LOVE this doll! They sleep with it every night and it serves as a tangible reminder that Jesus is always with them. One of my children told me, “I know I don’t have to be afraid (of the dark) because I hold my Jesus doll and remember that Jesus is in the room with me.”  This doll is perfect for a young-elementary child because it is not huge and will be easy to carry around.

The Jesus Storybook Bible

3. The Jesus Storybook Bible

 This is a phenomenal paraphrased Bible for kids. The text is age appropriate, the illustrations are captivating, and the overarching story focuses on God’s never ending, never giving up, always and forever love for his kids.  I have read what feels like HUNDREDS of Bibles (okay, a little overdramatic here) and I haven’t found one yet that comes close.

4. A Picture of Jesus

This is huge!  When you place a special picture of Jesus with a child or a lamb in your child’s room it is a daily reminder that Jesus is always with them. It is also a huge reinforcement that Jesus is priority in the life of your family.  For years, we have asked our children, Who is that that lamb that Jesus is holding? And they shout out, that’s me!

5. The Boy And The Ocean

“God’s love is like the ocean, my little boy,” she said. “It’s always here. It’s always deep. It never ends. God’s love is special.”

Oh my word, hands down, probably my favorite Christian picture book. The illustrations are beautiful, the words are life-changing, and what an amazing book to pull out at bedtime.   The story draws parallels between Gods creation and his vast love for his children. I love how Max Lucado, portrays parents who include God in everyday life. Both boys and girls will love this book.

God's Great Love For You by Rick Warren

6. God's Great Love For You by Rick Warren

This book is all about Gods overwhelming love for his kids told in such an imaginative way. Written by Rick Warren, the book shows a young girl on different adventures discovering God lavish love. The illustrations are adorable and though the book can be read to girls and boys, the book is specifically geared towards young girls.

Writing To God Kids Edition

7. Journal - Writing To God: Kids Edition

This book is an amazing and creative resource full of journal prompts that guide children in learning how to talk to God.  This book has 35 different prayer journal exercises and it covers prayer topics on events that happen during the day, emotions, praise, thanks, pain, and using their five senses.  Your child comes to find out that you can speak to God about EVERYTHING, and has actually practiced doing just that throughout the book. Love it

Praying in Color Kid's Edition

8. Journal - Praying in Color - Kid's Edition

Have you ever heard “But I don’t want to pray? I don’t know what to say? I’m embarrassed to pray out loud?” This is a revolutionary resource for children (and adults) who want to try another way to spend time with God.  The author, Sybil Macbeth gently leads children in understanding what prayer is, common prayer problems, how to pray, and step by step of how to pray using art. This has been an amazing resource for children and students who have felt inadequate or have had a hard time concentrating when it comes to prayer. Love it!

The Bible Doodle Book - Amazing Bible Pictures You Can Complete and Create!

9. Journal - The Bible Doodle Book

This doodle book has 100 unfinished drawings and stickers for children to complete.  I love it because the children can use the prompts to help them complete the drawings. You can use the drawings/prompts as a complement to your daily family devotions. A creative way to engage with the Bible!

Blank Journal

10. Journal

Choose a journal (with no lines) for your child to write or draw prayers that can be especially for this Lenten season.  After a lot of searching, the best journals seem to be found at your local craft store. Let me know if you find a great journal somewhere else!

The Animated Passion Trilogy

11. DVD - The Animated Passion Trilogy

This is a great visual retelling of the Easter story for preschool-elementary age kids. Something about a video allows the children to really experience the life of Jesus in a whole new way.

Matthew - Visual Bible

12. DVD - Matthew: Visual Bible DVD

This is a wonderful movie for older elementary children who are emotionally ready to watch the crucifixion and resurrection. It is not as graphic as the Messiah but I would still preview it ahead of time to make sure your kids are ready for it.

How to Help Your Child Experience Jesus this Easter

How to Help Your Child Experience Jesus this Easter

  

Reading Time: 5 min 31 sec

Have you ever had a year where you are so busy that one minute its Christmas and the next, it’s the Saturday before Easter and you are scrambling trying to cobble together outfits and stuff a million Easter eggs with chocolate bunnies?  

 

Do you wish that there was a way to really help your children understand that Easter is more than eggs, candy, with some Jesus thrown in?  ME TOO!

 

In our fast-paced society, it can be easy to pass over the importance of the lent season with nothing more than a thought or a good intention to stop eating chocolate.

 

But Lent is more than giving something up; it is a time of reflection, of preparing our hearts, of remembering Christ’s life, death and resurrection, and a concentrated time of refocusing on Jesus. A forty day (not including Sundays) fast, interwoven with prayer and giving that culminates on Easter Sunday.

 

We do not celebrate Lent or Easter as a way to earn more brownie points with God or as another task to complete. There is nothing we can do to make God love us any more or any less than he does right now.  We participate in Lent and Easter as a way to actively participate with the Holy Spirit in the transforming of our hearts.

 

I love how life as a follower of Jesus, is an ACTIVE, experiential life. We don’t just get to hear about God, we get to EXPERIENCE a relationship WITH God.  Children learn experientially, and active participation is formational in their spiritual growth. Lent and Easter is a time rich with experiences and a perfect way for children to actively engage in their faith.   

 

We are going to be talking about 13 meaningful experiences that you can have with your child as you learn to walk through this Easter season with intention. 

 

These are just suggestions. You do not need to do everything on the list but choose one or two activities that are speaking to you.   I pray that the Holy Spirit moves in the hearts of your family in powerful ways this Easter season.

 

  1. Art

  2. Devotional

  3. Drama

  4. Events

  5. Decorations

  6. Music

  7. Practices

 

A Couple of Tips: Your active participation with your child in the activity is HUGE. Do not to rush through these activities. It is not about getting them “done” and giving your child an Easter experience. This is not about being productive but about moving slowly, savoring, and giving the Holy Spirit elbow room to speak with your child. Allow for silence, (yes, this can work even with preschool children) in and around the activity.  

1.Use a Lent-Easter Family Devotional

 This is the BEST devotional, (Good Dirt Lent, Holy Week, Eastertide Devotional)  I have found yet for kids during Easter. The devotional is very doable for each day(it’s about a half a page).

 The devotional covers Lent, Holy Week and Eastertide and is written from an evangelical perspective. I really appreciate how each devotional is broken into four sections: Till (Prayer) Plant (Meditate on Scripture) Water (Reflect) Weed (Examine).  The book includes 14 weeks of devotionals.  You can grab your copy here!

2. Decorate Your Home

 Allow the decorations in your home to serve as a daily reminder of the importance of the Lenten season. The color purple serves as the traditional reminder of Easter. It symbolizes not only the pain of the cross but it is also the color of royalty, and it celebrates Jesus’s resurrection.  Decorate a table or space (or throughout the house) with the color purple, you could add a cross, a Bible and or a candle.  

 

3. Observe Ash Wednesday

Ash Wednesday serves as the start to the lenten season. It is important for your child to witness the community of God gathered together to worship him. Carving out time to attend serves speaks louder than words to your child about your family’s priorities.

 

4. Light a Candle 

 Every morning, start your day, by lighting a candle each day to as a reminder of Jesus’ shining light in the world. You can follow the lighting of the candle with prayer inviting him into your day.

 

5. Look at Art

 

Visit a church, or museum, in books, or print some pictures off the internet depicting the crucifixion and resurrection.  

 Start by inviting Jesus into this time. Find a piece that speaks to you or your child. Spend some time just enjoying the art.

Ask God what he is saying to you through this piece.  Remember, this is for you as much as it is for your child. It is powerful for your children to watch you engage with the Holy Spirit through art.

 

After a couple of minutes ask your child:

a) How does this piece make you feel?  

b.) What do you love about it?

c) What do you think the Father is saying to you through this piece?

 

Tip: Don’t rush. The goal is quality over quality. You are there to create elbow room for the Holy Spirit to speak to them through art. You are not there to teach your kids something (though they will learn). Also, don’t feel like you have to be there an hour to make it worthwhile.

6. Listen to an Easter Playlist

It is important to place a special emphasis on creating an environment that draws their hearts towards Jesus during this Lenten season.

Tip-I am loving the Lent and Easter Worship Songs Playlists by Salt of the Sound on Spotify

 

7. Act out the Easter Story

This can be as simple or elaborate as you desire. 🙂  This is great for allowing the children to really engage in the story of Easter. Remember this is not about getting it “right” but about engaging in the story of Jesus’ resurrection. 

Tip: Your children can also do this with stuffed animals or dolls.  

 

8. Draw Prayers to Jesus 

Layout art supplies, plain paper, and have your Easter playlist playing quietly in the background. Encourage your child to write or draw prayers to Jesus.

 Tip: This should not feel like a homework assignment. There is no correct way of doing this. This is their personal prayer to God. Let them know that they can but don’t have to share their prayers with you when they are done.

9. Watch a Video of the Easter Story

 

Here are two suggestions for younger and older children:

  1. Preschool-Elementary- The Animated Passion Trilogy
  2. Middle School-High School- Matthew:Visual Bible 

10. Use Playdough to Recreate the Empty Tomb

This is a GREAT, hands-on, simple activity to allow children to engage in the Easter story.

 

11. Draw or Paint an Easter Scene

Read through the story of Jesus’s death and resurrection. Encourage your children to draw or paint a picture of a scene from the Easter story that grabs their attention.  

Tip: I typically put on instrumental music in the background to help focus their attention on listening to Jesus.

12. Look for Ways to Serve Others

Pray with your children. And ask God what way he wants you to focus on serving others during this Lenten season. 

13. Attend a Good Friday and Easter Service

If appropriate allow your children to join you for all or part of the service. The death and resurrection of Jesus are foundational to our faith and allowing your child to witness that at a young age is HUGE!  Also, Easter sunrise services are amazing (especially for elementary age children).

 

14. Plan a Special Meal for Easter Sunday

 

The goal is to plan and prepare WITH your children a special meal celebrating Jesus’ resurrection. Invite over family and friends to celebrate.

 

Give your Easter season a strong foundation by grabbing your own copy of the Good Dirt: Lent, Holy Week & Eastertide Devotional. I am excited to travel through it with my own family this year!  You can get it here! 

 

What about you? What are your favorite ways to encourage a love of Jesus in your child during Easter? 

If you try any of these activities, let me know! Leave me a comment and don’t forget to follow Most Important Work on Pinterest!

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How to Raise Passionate Thoroughgoing Followers of Jesus

How to Raise Passionate Thoroughgoing Followers of Jesus

  

Reading Time: 4 min 48 sec

I have served in a variety of children’s and youth ministry roles over the years and every fall, I would look forward to that new group of incoming students. Every year, you would have 1 or two students who would just knock your socks off. Not with their magnetic personality (though some of them did) but with their desire to know Jesus.

 

 They were young men and women who were unabashed by their hunger for Jesus, they served others with a humble heart, spoke life over the people around them, and were never content with their current experience of Jesus.

 

They were in a word… Inspiring.

 

The crazy thing is that those same students are now grown, starting their own families, and are still pursuing a life WITH Jesus.

 

What made them so different from their peers?   

 

I believe there are four practical steps YOU can take to influence the spiritual life of your child.

  1. Experience God 

2. Focus on Heart Transformation    

3. Trust in the Holy Spirit

4. You can’t Lead where You Haven’t

   Been

 

 

1. Experience God 

 

Children learn primarily from their experiences.  Think about it, how did your children get to know you? Did they ask other people questions, did they study your family tree, did they spend time talking to others about you?  OR did they experience you from before they were born; the sound of your voice in the womb, the touch of your skin as they entered the world, the snuggles, the safety of your presence, the hugs?  They know you by EXPERIENCE, not by words.

 

A life of faith is not school but a real, breathing, organic relationship with Jesus. Your child needs to experience it, not just hear about it. I am not downplaying the crucial role of the Bible in our lives but we need to marry experience and knowledge together to grow as a thoroughgoing follower of Christ.  You can do this by intentionally including God into your everyday life.  

 

Light a candle to remind you of God’s presence, use art to help you listen to God’s voice, take a walk in God’s creation, observe Sabbath, use play to help focus your child on Jesus words, etc. (See this post for more practical ideas).  Experience is critical for children to establish a strong relationship with Jesus.   

 

2. Focus on Heart Transformation

 

Who doesn’t want your child to behave a civilized member of society? It’s an obvious question, but as parents (myself included) we can quickly move to focus on behavior modification (You do this and you will get x, y, and z) and completely miss the opportunity of heart transformation.

 

The heart can be a tricky place as it is where our thoughts and feelings originate. As parents, we can manage behaviors but the heart is harder to control.   So what can we do to encourage our children to make Godly decisions even when we aren’t around?

 

We cannot by-pass heart work.  We need to look deeper than external behaviors and notice the movement of their hearts.

 

In the book Parenting is Heart Work, the author says it this way; “Motivating Heart change isn’t easy. You can force a child to change behavior, but you can’t force a change of heart. Its deeper work. Helping children change their hearts requires a lot of thought, planning, and prayer. More and more parents are relearning discipline so that they can have a lasting impact on their children.”

 

Prayer is a great and crucial first step in parenting for heart transformation.  We can miss out on a beautiful opportunity if we fall into the trap of praying for our kids only when there is a crisis.  Covering our children in consistent prayer not only teaches us to be sensitive to the movements of their heart, but also gives room for the Holy Spirit to bring about our own heart transformation.   

Prayer is a two-way street, take some time to be silent before God, listening for his voice and being present to him. God is faithful to highlight the issues that you need to be focusing on.

If you are interested in going deeper you can grab the book, Parenting is Heart Work by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller

3. Trust in the Holy Spirit 

 

As parents, we have to have trust in the Holy Spirit. We can try to do everything right and still blow it.  We have to remember that parenting works well only when we are utterly dependent upon God and our huge need for grace.

 

We need to realize (believe, not just say) that on our own we can do nothing, but only by the power of the Holy Spirit, can we make a difference in the spiritual lives of our children. As children are observing the lives of their parents, soaking in their family values, and experiencing Jesus in real ways, they are internalizing all of that information.

 

 “As they are ready, children construct or form their understandings for themselves, with the gracious presence, encouragement, and guidance of God’s Spirit.” Catherine Stonehouse and Scottie May, Listening to Children on the Spiritual Journey.

 

It does not come down to what you say (though that’s still important) but how you model your life WITH God, and through the work of the Holy Spirit that determines how your child views and interacts with God.

 

We need to remember that we are working with the Holy Spirit, not the Holy Spirit working with us. We don’t have to have all the answers or be Super Mom.  What we have to do is place our children before God, and be continually dependent upon the Holy Spirit to shape our parenting. We can rest in the knowledge that the Holy Spirit will be with our child long after they have grown up.

 

4. You Can’t Lead Where You Haven’t Been 

 

Seriously, if you want your child to have a living, breathing, transformational relationship with Jesus, it starts with you. Multiple studies have shown that parents are the primary influencers in the lives of their children. You and your relationship with God set the tone for the culture of your home.  

 

“The greatest parenting tip we could share with you is this: Maintain a strong connection to your Heavenly Father. He offers spiritual guidance and direction to help you work through your own heart issues so you can be more effective with your children.” -Parenting is Heart Work

 

Investing in your relationship with God is one of the most important things you can do for yourself, let alone your children.  When they see you turning to God all throughout the day, when they see you on your knees, when they see serving others, you are a modeling a life lived WITH God.   

 

Grab your FREE Deeper Life Beginners Guide and join our community of moms who are hungry for more of Jesus in their lives and in the lives of their children.

 

 

What about you? What is your #1 concern when it comes to raising Godly children? 

Please feel free to leave me a comment and don’t forget to follow Most Important Work on Pinterest!

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